


A Wall-E Christmas

by jheen



Category: WALL-E (2008)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-12-21
Updated: 2008-12-21
Packaged: 2018-01-25 08:37:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1641899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jheen/pseuds/jheen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Computer," he said eagerly, "define Christmas."</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Wall-E Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [artyartie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/artyartie/gifts).



> Thanks to my very beloved Wren who made this work at the very last minute.

Captain B. Mc Crea lowered himself into his chair with a weary sigh. The reclamation and restoration of Earth was going well--better than he'd dared to hope some days, better by far than in the nightmares he never admitted to anyone but his personal medic --but it was a long and tiring process, requiring endless labour and equally endless research, trying to detangle one puzzle after another. This latest one was particularly thorny: the medi-bot had threatened him with bed rest if he didn't take a holiday. Whatever that was. 

"Computer, define `Holiday,'" he said with another sigh, pillowing his head on the desk. 

"'Holiday,'" repeated the computer, "An appointed time of rest and celebration, usually lasting for a day or more. Holidays offer a time of rest, contemplation, and stress relief, reference A113256-B, and are often of religious, cultural, or celestial significance, as expressed in the word `holiday', a contraction and compound of the words `holy' and `day'. While most holidays were unique to their culture, a few became world-wide phenomenon such as the mid-winter religious celebration of Christmas, a time of feasting, family, and gift giving."

The captain sat up in his chair, a bright smile stretching across his face. "Computer," he said eagerly, "define `Christmas.'"

\---

"People, I have a wonderful idea!" the captain announced the next day at lunch. "We're going to celebrate Christmas!"

Sitting beside the captain was a member of the farming team. "Captain, would you pass the salt?" Samuel asked as he continued to stare at the SAUT-A's latest attempt at "pizza". He didn't remember the pictures of pizza being lime green...

The captain huffed slightly. "Did you hear what I said? We're going to celebrate _Christmas!_ " 

"Yeah, I heard," Samuel said as he stabbed the top layer with his fork, lifting it off entirely. "Is cheese suppose to be green or yellow?"

"The computer says it can be either and even both," April, newly appointed to the historical food team, said excitedly. "It just depends on how its made. Some cheese is made with a bacteria culture and it creates these veins of blue-ish green in the cheese."

"Oh." Samuel glared at the emerald colored cheese and plopped it on the side of his plate, easily tuning out the librarian's babble as she continued to explain the making of cheese. "Captain, the salt?"

The captain sulked in his chair, bottom lip out in a pout. "You didn't want to hear about Christmas." 

Samuel sighed, resigning himself to listening to _somebody_ talk about things he really didn't care about. "Give me the salt bowl and I'll be all ears." 

The captain hastily passed over the bowl of salt, spilling some of the white crystals onto the table. Samuel took a pinch of the spilled salt and tossed it over his shoulder as the captain leaned forward, eyes shining with excitement, "Well, Christmas is a holiday that..."

By the end of the third impassionate sentence, April's cheese babble had dwindled to nothing as she was swept up in the captain's explanation of this ancient holiday. As the captain explained the concept of snowmen - "White men - like robots! - created out of white, cold fluff! With these black hats!" the rest of the table had been drawn from their own conversations to pay sole attention to the captain.

Arms gesturing as he climbed up on his chair, the captain continued on, "And they give things to their family and friends! Presents, they're called! They put them under the Christmas tree!"

"Christmas tree?" Somebody asked from the crowd that started to gather around the table. 

The captain opened his mouth to answer, when above their heads Wall-E and Eve flew by, the trash compactor cradled in Eve's arms. Eve's head was bent over, resting lightly on Wall-E's and while they were too far away to make out what, if anything, the robots were saying, everyone could hear the happy chittering noises they were sharing.

"Wall-E! Eve!" came from the crowd and John waved his hand up as his friends. The two robots paused a second and Wall-E waved back, before they continued on. 

Everyone smiled after the robots, the holiday celebration forgotten for a few minutes, but then a young girl tugged at the bottom of the captain's pants. "Chrism's tree?" she asked again. 

"Oh! Christmas tree!" The captain laughed as he sat down on the table, reaching for the child. "It's this amazing thing... you take a tree, like the little ones we're growing, and you put on these shining balls - they're called ornaments," the captain said gleefully as he perched the girl on his knee. "And lights! Lots of lights of all sorts of colors!" As the captain continued to describe this bright, cheerful holiday, murmurs slowly spread through the crowd as plans were made.

Hours later, as the crowd dispersed to spread the idea of Christmas through the rest of the population, Mary and John approached the captain. "Isn't this a wonderful idea?" the captain bounced the little girl still sitting on his knee. "And we'll have to find presents for everyone! Proper presents! Maybe some sort of toys for the children..." he eyed the girl dubiously. "Although, I'm not sure why toys shaped like wild animals is suppose to be reassuring." 

John smiled politely and reached for Mary's hand. "Actually, we have an idea for a present for Wall-E and Eve." 

\---

The Christmas celebration was in full swing. Everywhere, happy humans danced, talked, laughed, ate, and decorated trees, walls, robots and each other, watched and sometimes helped by bemused robots. PR-T and VN-GO were particularly in their element, gaily festooning everything that held still long enough and ambushing things that weren't.

Wall-E and Eve stood before a SECUR-T robot that a rather brave PR-T had attempted to fashion into a snowman. White stuffing, apparently from the inside of a broken chair, was glued to his frame and somehow, a bright orange stick had been stuck right above his glass panel. The impact of its angrily flashing yellow light and loud beeps was greatly reduced in urgency by the black hat sitting with a jaunty tilt on top. 

"Wall-E! Eve!" Mary called out to the curious robots, waving her hand wildly in the air. Wall-E reluctantly turned away from the fluff covered SECUR-T robot, eyes drawing together as he made a whirling, puzzled noise. Mary grinned and gestured them toward her, practically bouncing on her toes. "Over here!"

Wall-E waved to the sulking "snowman" and started to roll over to the small group of humans and robots gathered in the center, Eve floating beside him. 

Mary leapt forward after he'd completed half the distance and knelt to hug him, having learned from painful experience that trying to pick up Wall-E tended to result in a rapid trip to the floor. Eve twitched for a moment, used to the human habit of grabbiness but still never happy when anyone got between her and her trash-bot. "Happy Christmas-day, you two!" she said cheerfully. "It's too bad you guys don't eat, the food is wonderful!"

Wall-E burbled cheerfully at her and offered her a plush toy predator of some sort, brown with prominent front teeth and very long ears. It held some sort of root vegetable.

Mary squealed as happily as one of her babies and hugged the beast. "Thank you, Wall-E! Little Eva will just love this!" She turned to John. "Honey, tell them about the present--I'll be right back." She bustled over to the baby's hoverchair.

John grinned wryly down at the `bots. "She's really gotten into this," he said quietly. "You know how she likes to mother the little `uns. --anyway, the Captain said that Christmas-day was a time for gift-giving, and you two--well, you're our heroes, it's as simple as that. Mary had the idea, but all of us worked on this at least a little--"

"MO TOO!" Mo piped up and the reject bots around him made agreeing noises and crowded around Wall-E and Eve, chittering with excitement.

"--Mo especially," Mary said with a small laugh, coming up behind him to take his hand in hers. "Guys," she called, turning back, "it's time for the Big One!"

The crowd hushed and hurried over, gathering in an enormous circle around them as one couple ushered another to a large, gaily-wrapped box, against which the Captain was leaning.

"Wall-E, Eve, if you and your laser would do the honours of opening it?"

Wall-E beeped in agreement and started to reach for a corner of the wrapping paper, but Eve, with her eyes as wide as any of the children scattered among the party, was faster, ripping the paper into confetti that floated around the small crowd in the middle. Opening the box, she reached into it and pulled out... booster rockets? Eve could already fly...

"It's for Wall-E," Mary said softly as she plopped on the ground beside them. She reached for the rockets. "So you can dance together like you did in space." With as much care as anyone had seen her treat her babies, she turned Wall-E around and attached it to his back, draping a control over the front of Wall-E. "You just press this button," she instructed the `bot as she put the remote into his hand, "and use this knob to control." 

Wall-E paid just enough attention to understand the mechanics before pressing the button. He awkwardly floated in the middle of the circle, twisting around to test everything. Finally, he turned back to his beloved and held out his other hand. "EVE."

Eve wasted no time in snatching Wall-E's hand and in seconds, the two bots were laughing and dancing together among the bright blue sky. 

 


End file.
